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If you evaluated a person’s life from the perspective of how much they tried to escape their problems, I would be considered a marathon runner.
It is my natural way of being. If I don’t like it, then I leave. I’ve been on the run for 15 years.
My parents didn’t understand it at first. “What’s so wrong with us and your home? Do you hate us that much?”
“Nothing and no!”
I just don’t see why staying in a place and time that makes you unhappy is a smart move. And, I’ve had a few demons I’ve wanted to run from too. Gotta shake that monkey off my back.
I think we are all messed up. It’s the nature of being human. There’s just varying degrees, but who is to say my messed upness is less than or worse than yours? The truth is we are all trying to escape from it. It’s just a matter of how involved we are with it consciously.
Craig and I recently had this discussion over dinner. I truly believe you can run away from your problems.
BUT, and there is a huge BUT here.
You can’t run with the view of escaping yourself. You can run to eliminate the outer conditions that may in some way inhibit or restrict you, but you can never run from yourself.
“But, you’ve run before and you made it work,” Craig said to me.
“Yes, and anyone who has problems should travel and run from them, but they have to do it with the intention of creating a better self once they escape those things that seem to be holding them back.”
You can run. You can run forever to escape those external factors, but you can never escape yourself. Travel will never help you create a better life unless you choose to reinvent yourself along the way.
Often we have to leave the place we are at. There are people and places and memories that hold us into being this person we know we really aren’t.
Part of the challenge of living back in my home town is that most people only know me as the person I was 10 years ago. I am not that person anymore, nor have been for years. I ran from her and changed her. It was the best decision she ever made.
Get away from what people expect you to be and become who you truly are. When you become who you truly are you overcome any issues and you find your peace and happiness.
And because all good country music songs tell great stories about moving on, here’s one from The Dixie Chicks:
She needs wide open spaces. Room to make a mistake. She needs new faces. She knows the high stakes.
Remove the shackles, use travel as a way to reinvent yourself. Find out what didn’t work and make it work to the beat of your drum. Travel has this magical ability to bring your sacredness into the light.
Share your thoughts or ask a question in the comments below…
I love this perspective. Thank you for sharing, I know exactly what you mean 🙂
Pleasure Melissa. Enjoy the marathon!! It makes life so much sweeter.
I truly enjoy reading your blog. This one was inspirational and elevating. I’ve running away from problems my entire life. But travel. Although short most times gives you and allows you that freedom. Thank you
Thank you Lilia! I’m so glad it could help you. Keep finding that power from travel , but more importantly from yourself.
Totally agree Caz – I like the phrase
“Those who say you can’t run away from your problems simple aren’t running fast enough”
I’m the first to admit I use travel to escape – broken relationships, office life…and the UK in general!
Can’t say I regret abusing travel like that and like you it’s changed me for the better 🙂
Keep on running 😉
Too right Chris. I’m an Olympic sprinter I think! I’m so looking forward to going away in a month because I just know all my problems will disappear, or at least I’ll have greater control over them.
You can’t go wrong with the wind at your back and a gum tree for your home. I can see my running for the next 3 years at least. Feels damn good!
We might have to have a race 🙂
I completely agree with you! I have written several posts on my blog about how traveling has changed the way I think and view life. I have discovered so many about myself – I have found the true meaning of life with my travels. It’s worthless to covet things, to compete, to worry and fret about stupid things. Travel gives you freedom to be yourself – confident, beautiful and happy!
Love it Renuka. You’ve summed it up perfectly. It’s total freedom and acceptance and with that comes peace and joy. The true purpose of life.
I actually have no idea if I’m running or not. I DO want to experience sooo many things in the world, and that is basically why I travel.
On the other hand (and I just realized this yesterday), I don’t want a “normal” life. I used to want it. Or so I thought. I used to believe that everyone should do stuff (get an education, a job, a house etc.) because “that’s what you do”. When I was halfway into my law studies I was unhappy and decided to quit. Ever since then all people asked me was “what are you going to study now?” and “You should get a better job and find out what you want with your life”. I couldn’t take it. And now we travel… I feel more at peace. Maybe I AM running!
Love the perspectives in this post, Caz. Really keeps your brain working. Thanks!
Awesome! Love keeping the brain working. It keeps it from making you fearful. Celia, this is my second stint at trying to make a normal life work. Blah. Just can’t do it. I think you just have to accept you have a gypsy heart and run with it.
I think I have used to travel to discover the real me.
When I left school I felt locked into this person my school collegues had created for me – I knew it wasn’t me.
So I travelled and got to invent the person I am today.
Isn’t it great to have total control over your invention. It makes you realize just how much we let others decide who we should be. No. I just want to be me! I think that is what we are all striving for. Travel just lets you do it far easier.
It’s so true to getting out of certain circumstances creates room to grow yourself. And those who run to escape themselves usually learn pretty quickly that it’s not going to work. I think the ultimate challenge is trying to reintegrate your new self into those old surroundings, while still holding true to the new you.
Or never come back, eh? Haha. =]
Oh yes! The reintegration is sooooo difficult, which is why so many people struggle with reverse culture shock. I know I have. Whereas on the road I could say what I wanted and share what was inside of me, upon return home I found myself quiet, hiding myself away and not feeling like I could share anything. It’s not nice.
So I’m thinking the perfect solution is to just never come back LOL
Hi Caz!
Such a short and sweet post! It really hits home for me and almost brought tears! I thought I was the only one who felt this way. I am 23 and moving to London in February from Los Angeles. It is such a huge step for me but I am so excited! Everyone keeps asking me why and there really is no reason besides continuing a life someplace else! Good to know I am not crazy haha
Thanks for the post and I LOVE reading your newsletters when I get them! SO amazing what you have done!
Xo,
Samantha
Oh Samantha..my daughter did exactly that. Arrived not knowing anyone, stayed at a hostel till she found somewhere to live.. Going up the stairs at the train station loaded with a suitcase laptop bag, hand luggage handbag her roll on handle broke. A french family helped her up to the pavement and got her a cab..from then she met so many people only too willing to help..You will find it very expensive there sadly. She was paying $330 a week rent $60 week for tube transport didnt leave much for anything else. And that was an hour out of London at Clapham. But she survived and met her fiancee there. And 54 countries later she came home for 2 years. Heading off again next week. I wish you all the luck and safe travels. If you need any hints she would only be too happy to help you or even put in touch with her friends for a bed..cheers Liz
Escapism is how I stumbled into the blogosphere and travel blogs in the first place! I know I’m running away, but the view is so pretty where I’m NOT at!
Michelle @ Mishfish13
This article embodies what I have been doing for the last five years….trying to move on from the past, toxic “friends” and peoples mistaken opinions of me and who they think I am. I’m just trying to find a place where the girl I really am can shine without fear. Happy to know there are others out there that feel the same way. Thank you!
“I’m just trying to find a place where the girl I really am can shine without fear.” – I love this! Shine on!
No, I believe escapism can have dire consequences with anyone. To escape means to typically run away, and to run away means to not face something. And to not face something lets said something grow into an enormous and fierce beast that will come back to ravage your life.
Travel is a high, yes, but traveling to escape will make the fall from that euphoric high catastrophic. One thing traveling for the first time to New Zealand taught me was the same thing running away from my hometown after the death of my father taught me. You will be haunted no matter what from these things until you look them straight in the eyes and face them.
But New Zealand showed me I was still doing this, and exposed my issues with self-worthiness like an open wound, and I finally realized I needed to heal it. Not by ignoring or escaping, but by doing things for myself.
Many people, including myself at one point, think travel can be the end-all-be-all-cure-all for what ails your heart. It can’t. But what it can do is give you the solitude needed to see inside yourself, and to begin to realize what you need to do for happiness. It made me realize that happiness isn’t in the traveling, but what the traveling provides me: Challenges, knowledge, exposure, hardship, cunning, and all other skills you begin to utilize on an adventure. It presents me with the nakedness needed to realize that I was still trying to live up to some other standard, to show people “I made it!”
But now, and the reason I write so much about my turmoils in life, is because for the first time I am facing it. I hid away emotions, truths, and weaknesses for so long that it came back to haunt me after returning from New Zealand.
I travel to live, to find my own self worth and happiness. I travel for the journey, not the destination, and surely not to escape, but to face the world head on.
Oh, and great read! That was not a challenge to your article, and I apologize about the rant, but you suddenly filled me with the urge to reveal another truth, so thank you! Love your reads.
Oh no rant away and reveal!! Totally accepted and embraced Ryan and I totally agree with you. You can’t ever run from yourself, but you can run from the conditions that prevent you from changing and creating that life and person you really want.
That’s how I’ve used travel, its given me the space and the time to face myself, own who I am, work out the kinks and then reinvent myself to be who I truly want.
I’m all ready for our upcoming road trip. I have a list of the problems I am running from, but with each of those I also have a strategy as to how to face them and then reinvent in order to overcome and start again. The points you raised are so important for people to understand and what I hope I was putting forth in the post.
Well said! Running from your problems has such negative associations, but often it’s the best thing to do. If something isn’t working in your current life, you should change it. It’s not about running scared from an old life, it’s about running towards what you want. But there’s also that saying: “wherever you go, there you are”; as you said, you can’t expect your problems to go away unless you’re willing to personally adapt, change and grow too.
Absolutely I think people don’t realize that you can run towards what you want. They think they have to remain stuck in their problems. Not I. I need to get away from the ickiness so I can start afresh with a new game plan!
Wow… couldn’t be more perfect timing for this post. This is just what I needed for motivation! I will be leaving for my first solo trip ever to Europe for 2 months! I have been following you guys for awhile and have been part of my motivation to traverse the world, Thanks.
So wonderful to hear. Thank you Eugene! You enjoy your travels, it sounds amazing. You will have the BEST time!
I love the feeling of freedom and self-expression I get reading this write up… You helped me realize that its not just travelling for the sake of escaping. It should also be escaping to find your better self 🙂
Great post and timing, Caz Makepeace! I started thinking about this just a day ago.
Anything can be escapist. Heck, I can fetishize my pencil. And social media? Pffff!
How about this perspective: Travelers don’t (necessarily) run away but go towards? Perhaps travel is no different than, say, being home one fine evening and feeling “I’d like to go out and get an ice cream.” And then … you do it. Voila! You listened to a desire and then acted upon it. At that moment, life was not about guilt, responsibility, etc. but — perish the thought! — enjoyment. Perhaps the best travelers love themselves enough to actually commit to their own happiness.
This is my hope for myself: Feel more joy. So, it took a couple years to get it all together, but I shoved off in early June with no return date. At this point, all I can say for sure is that I am less anxious than when I live out a normal life of work, home, car, etc. We have all had thousands of voices injected into our craniums, saying “this is the sort of life you are supposed to live.” But that does not make it true. Travelers are independent thinkers!
I so love this comment!
“You listened to a desire and then acted upon it. At that moment, life was not about guilt, responsibility, etc. but — perish the thought! — enjoyment. Perhaps the best travelers love themselves enough to actually commit to their own happiness.”
Goosies!!
At the moment in my life I feel a ton of anxiety and I know in one months time when I drive away to start our new chapter all of that will vanish.
I really do think I’ll be running forever.
I totally agree with this post. I think travel is a great platform to be able to escape all preconceived views other’s have on you and it becomes a lot easier to act and be the person you want to be and agree that you can travel as far away from your home as you want trying to escape your problems but if you are not happy with yourself or the problems are with you then that emotional baggage is going to come along for the ride no matter how far you travel.
Yep. Your shadows will follow unfortunately, but its so much easier to clear them up once you free yourself from everything else that gets in the way.
I agree Caz. You can run, but travel reveals so much about yourself. You learn so much about yourself as you run which helps you understand why you really wanted to get away in the first place. Travel brings you perspective and is the best education I’ve ever had.
Absolutely Chrissy. I learned a ton about myself while I was running, mostly that I was much stronger and more capable than I realized. That is such a helpful thing to learn!! LOVE your NYC pictures. Craving a run to there right now!
Although I don’t exactly think I’m running away from anything, (apart from a bad economy and unemployment back home ;D) travel has certainly created a new me!
They are great reasons to run Beth!! 🙂 Why remain stuck in bad economic situation. Might as well have fun and travel instead. It’s so great to have the freedom to constantly reinvent yourself.
Sometimes I feel like you’re blogging just for me! Great post and great comments by all. As said before – it’s not about running FROM, it’s about running TO. TO new experiences, TO self-discovery, TO new possibilities…
I become very restless when I haven’t travelled for a while – like now…
Hopefully I’ll be able to again soon.
Yes. That restlessness is a sign to move on. Mine is killer at the moment. I find myself pacing the floors and searching for something I have to do but can’t find it. It’s that feeling that says, I gotta get out of here, I’m done now.
I hope you can run towards it soon
It can definitely work as a great way to learn things and challenge yourself, but that’s a little different from an “escape.” If you just run away and come back without things moving forward, then it’s like a hamster wheel. Escape + learn = worthwhile adventure, rather than mere diversion. That’s why I never liked non-travelers describing it as escapism, because it’s somewhat derogatory, and they don’t understand that maybe sometimes life is worth escaping from.
For sure. Hate those damn hamster wheels. I think I love to run because I love to change, and I feel I can’t if I remain in the same place. I think life on the travel road is so much freer and more enjoyable, so it is definitely worth running to escape the drudgery of normal life. Gound hog Day sends me bonkers!
Like writers fear about a Writer’s block, or an actor fears about stage fright, I wonder if I travel because I enjoy, or if it is an escapism of sorts which I’ll realise at some point in the future.
I wonder if I am trying to run, escape, or just live in the present. During the times I’m planning, I wonder, reassess and make sure that if I need to face something, I will. It helps me bring perspective and reconsider things in life.
Thanks for the post!
Pleasure Maria! Thank you for your insightful comment. I think travel helps you to live in the present more, which is why it is so helpful to escape with it.
Escape yourself? Tough call to find the answer by dusting off the passport. on the other hand, escape a mundane life at home. easy call.
Very easy Gary!!
I am unsubscribing, I don’t want a lonely hearts blog I want a travel one. Keep your problems to yourself.
Thanks for being with us for as long as you were! All the best with your travels
Good article , it is very interesting , thanks so much .
I like how you address all the aspects of travel – anyone can write about how to get from point A to B, or tell us that they like a certain restaurant or accommodation. There’s so much more to it than that and you face it head on. In fact, I’m wondering if you have done an article on the reverse culture shock you mention above. I found that to be the most surprising aspect of travel and hardest to deal with.
When I was younger, so many things kept me from travelling, but I was able to attain some of the benefits you are talking about here by making a big move to the other end of the country. It’s like having the best of both worlds. I was able to get away from all the negative influences and the labels and expectations put on me by other people, yet still have some semblance of “normal” (read: career & family) that gave me so-called “security”.
At age 50, I realized that “normal” is overrated and “security” is an illusion. It’s easy for me to handle the logistics of travel, but blogs like yours are necessary to help understand and handle the other aspects.
Thanks for putting yourself out there.
hey caz, i think the travel reveals everything about you, and i think escape and learn means adventure., simple call
I loved this part. keep running but you could never run away from yourself.
I was really nice to read your article.
good luck to stay on track.
thanks so much .